Ahoy! Avast! Believe it or not, today (September 19) is International Talk Like A Pirate Day.
Below are some words and phrases you might like to throw into your conversations if you want to have a bit of fun to get into the spirit of this feast day. The words and phrases are courtesy of http://www.talklikeapirate.com/
Asked why such a day should be included in the calendar - which seems a quite bizarre concept to say the least - those behind it had the following to say - “It gives your conversation a swagger, an elán, denied to landlocked lubbers. The best explanation came from a guy at a Cleveland radio station who interviewed us on the 2002 Talk Like a Pirate Day (TLAP). He told us we were going to be buried by people asking for interviews because it was a 'whimsical alternative' to all the serious things that were making the news so depressing.”
Pirate lingo vocabulary
Beauty – The best possible pirate address for a woman. Always preceded by “me,” as in, “C’mere, me beauty,” or even, “me buxom beauty,” to one particularly well endowed. You’ll be surprised how effective this is.
Bilge rat – The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It’s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. On TLAP Day – A lot of guy humor involves insulting your buddies to prove your friendship. It’s important that everyone understand you are smarter, more powerful and much luckier with the wenches than they are. Since bilge rat is a pretty dirty thing to call someone, by all means use it on your friends.
Bung hole – Victuals on a ship were stored in wooden casks. The stopper in the barrel is called the bung, and the hole is called the bung hole. That’s all. It sounds a lot worse, doesn’t it? On TLAP Day – When dinner is served you’ll make quite an impression when you say, “Well, me hearties, let’s see what crawled out of the bung hole.”
Grog – An alcoholic drink, usually rum diluted with water, but in this context you could use it to refer to any alcoholic beverage other than beer, and we aren’t prepared to be picky about that, either. Call your beer grog if you want. We won’t stop you! Water aboard ship was stored for long periods in slimy wooden barrels, so you can see why rum was added to each sailor’s water ration – to kill the rancid taste. On TLAP Day – Drink up, me hearties! And call whatever you’re drinking grog if you want to.
Hornpipe – Both a single-reeded musical instrument sailors often had aboard ship, and a spirited dance that sailors do. On TLAP Day – We are not big fans of the capering, it’s not our favorite art form, if you will, so we don’t have a lot to say on the subject, other than to observe that the common term for being filled with lust is “horny,” and hornpipe then has some comical possibilities. “Is that a hornpipe in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? Or both?”
Lubber – (or land lubber) This is the seaman’s version of land lover, mangled by typical pirate disregard for elocution. A lubber is someone who does not go to sea, who stays on the land. On TLAP Day – More likely than not, you are a lubber 364 days of the year. But not if you’re talking like a pirate! Then the word lubber becomes one of the more fierce weapons in your arsenal of piratical lingo. In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is ALWAYS an insult.
Smartly – Do something quickly. On TLAP Day – “Smartly, me lass,” you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.
Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
*Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
*Come on up and see me urchins.
*Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
*I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
*Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?
*How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
*Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
*Prepare to be boarded.
*They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
*You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
*Wanna shiver me timbers?
*I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
*That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
*Let's get together and haul some keel.
*That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.
Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates
*Is that a belayin' pin in yer britches, or are ye ... (this one is never completed)
*Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
*That's quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
*Aye, I guarantee ye, I've had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice ratio!"
* I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
*C'mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
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